Bring Back The Bradbury!

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Doom And Gloom

A post from Tedious Tantrums

Well that’s it then. Another BBC News at 6:00 and then BBC Scotland News. What fun.

Inflation is down. Comments were directed at it still being too high and the historical editorial was that interest rates should be put up. No sign of any cheer then, that inflation was going down. Not a glimmer. Good news? Not for the BBC apparently.

Then there was that happy soul and interesting character Ed Moribund. Ed thinks it’s a good idea that public sector pay rises are kept at 1%. His pals in the unions think this is an appalling idea. They would though because that’s their job. Ed reckons that a 1% increase means more people will be kept in work. He may well have a point, however; his party have spent the last few months rubbishing even the notion of a 1% pay restriction. Now he is agreeing with Call me Dave and Boy George Osborne. He’s also agreed with them about the union and they will jointly oppose the SNP notion that Scotland should leave the UK. That’s a lot of agreement between the government and the opposition. Not much cheer in this article on the BBC news either.

Oh well maybe the Scottish News will be chock-a-block with chuckles? Then again, perhaps not. Highland Council voted to oppose a wind farm in the Cairngorms. This isn’t good apparently. No real mention of how 31 wind turbines 360 feet high might be detrimental to the environment. Unsightly? Damaging to birds? Expensive to erect and run and producing the most expensive electricity possible.

The very next item , and this is hard to believe, covered Big Power Week. We have the power? No, but we have incredibly expensive electricity and gas. Big Power Week is being carried out by the Citizens Advise Bureau. They have advisors all over Scotland this week providing advice to the public so they can reduce their gas and electricity bills. Good idea.

There’s one bit of advice they could provide to people, well certain people who work in government like a Mr A Salmond, a Mr D Cameron, a Mr C Huhne and a Ms C Lucas amongst others. Remove the renewables levy from electricity bills saving everyone 20% on their bills immediately. That would ease household budgets and reduce inflation.

At least the Scottish News has a saving grace - the weather ladies. Thon wee Cubie lassie and Judith Ralston do a good job of presenting the weather news.

Which brings me to my final gripe. Who trains the BBC presenters in hand waving? Do they go to classes and learn how to develop waving and personalise the waving, gesturing and general wafting to match their personality? Just give us the news wave free please and try to keep it within balanced bounds. I know that is a big ask but we can only try eh?

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Short Back And Sides For Me Please

Contributed by tedioustantrums

There are days when I hear something on the news and I wonder what’s going on. There have been several of those days recently. It wouldn’t be so bad if it was all on the same topic but it’s been items from all over the place.

Today's was BO (Barack Obama) telling the EU that their financial crisis should be addressed sooner rather than later. Really? This is a man who is convinced that throwing money at any problem is the way to go. Not to worry though, his days in office are numbered. What will the next occupant of the oval office do when they sit down at their new desk and BO has left a note saying – no cash left, ha, ha! They’ll reach for another note that’s been left by the Chinese saying – We own you, phone us when you get a moment as we have an offer you can’t refuse. What an interesting moment that will be. Bowel control will be all… at that moment to avoid an inelegant occurrence.

The EU is a big mess. Our politicians tell us we have to be in it and stay in it because it’s our biggest market. There isn’t going to be much of a market soon. We are in hock for as long as we can imagine. We can’t trade our way out because we don’t actually make much of anything these days. Just today three thousand people working in manufacturing won’t be anymore very soon. Although there are bright spots in UK manufacturing there are too few and they are too small.

No, the next biggest achievement that our great country (the UK) is going to take part in is hairdressing. I’ve always considered hairdressing to be a pretty safe job. I mean we all have hair, pretty much anyway, and it needs cut fairly often. So this could be a canny move. The pity of it is though not a single hair on a single head will even come close to a pair of scissors. No. This hairdressing is not for the faint hearted it’s for the con men and con ladies.

Apparently, the Greeks and some of the other Euro zone countries are going to have a haircut or a trim. This is the grand throwaway term for an orderly mass default. The figure being reported is between 30%-50% of debt will be written off. The banks will get burned but they will be able to use money provided by central banks so it won’t be a total loss. The Greeks and the other countries will be able to afford their hugely reduced debt burden and people can trade bits of paper for large wads of cash which they can spend on other bits of papers which they will sell to their mates until the music stops again. What a wizard wheeze! No one has tried that before. It’s bound to work. Of course it will. A man on the telly will tell us so. And we will believe him because he’s on the BBC and they know stuff.

Where will the Central Banks get the money? They’ll print more. There’s money to be made in printing money you know. Now there may be a slight surge in inflation. I say slight but it might be large, well it’s almost bound to be large isn’t it? I’m going to get an application in soon for 50% of my debt to be written off like that too. I’d encourage you to do the same. It’s a great idea. It’ll offset our inflation, we’ll have more money to spend and we’ll have more money for them to tax. Works for everyone really.

So BO, the EU has a plan. Many great minds came together to think this up including “Call me Dave” and trustworthy, confidence inspiring and man of the people George Osborne, that wee French guy and Anglia Meercat. The flashy Italian guy is with one of his nieces and the Spanish chap is a bit busy at the moment, he has to learn to do some really complicated juggling. The Irish guy has been keeping a low profile over the past week or so as he’s expecting a visit from a politician from Belfast. Can’t think why that would be worrisome. Can you?

Let’s get back to the normal quality news. Things like the world is going to end because a washed up American politician says the weather is a bit blowy and balmy, a Russian politician has had a face lift, a girlie, almost but not quite, celeb may well marry someone very rich, a lady has been to a wedding again and taken her very splendid bottom with her, Boris hasn’t been in the news for a couple of days.

A rare bird, generally called a Turkey, was thought to have suffered an unprecedented drop in their population numbers last November/December. However, the scientists who made this discovery are now saying the turkey isn’t as rare as it was thought to be. They have confirmed, after counting them again recently, that numbers have returned to previous levels although they have concerns that a similar drop in numbers may take place in November due to climate change. The scientists are asking for additional funds to carry out further research (and Christmas is coming and it’s an expensive time).

Now that is real journalism.

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Mad Mac

Contributed by petem

“Society and civilisation as known in the 1960’s and 1970’s was now completely lost for all time. Inflation had brought about the destruction of economies of all the countries of the world. Even the communist bloc could not stand up to the rising prices and drop in the value of currency as greed and ambition slowly destroyed the unity which world peace had secured. With the destructions of an economy in any country, then the banking system also died so that the movement of money was frozen. Money itself could no longer buy goods and so on until the people, who had not starved to death began to barter for food”.

Excuse the poor grammar and structure please. This was the opening to a short story I wrote around 1977. I went on to develop a post apocalypse world where oil was the key bartering currency and was controlled by those who had the skills to maintain the crude pipeline flows, refining, and distribution. No need for managers, boards or shareholders, just skills.

Sound familiar? Mad Max the 1979 movie? Close? No cigar though. All this proves is that I, like many others I am sure, recognised the above scenario from what was happening at the time. The clever people were, of course those who came up with the Mad Max synopsis and convinced backers to fund the film. They succeeded because they made a profit from it.

So what was happening back then? The Cold war was in full swing with the 1973 oil embargo and inflation, during 1975 peaked at 26.9%. (I remember only too well working in a sales office taking phone calls from customers who wanted to buy stuff and adding 25% to the prices they’d paid just a month previously, now that is genuinely scary. That was in 1980 when inflation peaked at a more reasonable 21.9%).

So with all these things going on in the background we all got on with our lives and managed. Just like we always do. Maybe you remember those times too?

And now look where we are. That nice Mr Heath got us into the Common Market with the promise it would make us all better off and Britain a better place to be. Mrs Thatcher came along and sorted everybody out. Pity about the manufacturing base although our union friends may also have had a wee hand in that too. Scottish oil came along and the benefits were spent on… well nothing useful for the long term. Black Wednesday and the ERM. On that fateful day, I got on a plane in London at lunchtime with interest rates about 10%. By the time I got to Edinburgh the rate was up to 15% although it settled back to 12% later.

Let’s face it, we certainly knew how to create complete shambles of record breaking proportions and blow loads of tax payers money in those days. Does that sound familiar?

But like all things, records are there to be broken. Not content with the much worse 2008 crash we are now approaching a crash of significant record-breaking proportions, which may well make Mad Max look like a reality, which we just can’t aspire to.

There has to be an answer to this. I don’t see anyone one tackling the underlying issues, which need to be addressed. I don’t see anyone coming up with a solution, which will avert another crash. I do see a growing danger that we’ll end up with a world record mess, which will devastate the economies of Europe, the USA and Australia at least. Ouch.

I have another question, which I’d like answered. Who, apart from George Soros, has all the money lost during all of these crashes and adjustments, (insert suitable euphemism to personal taste here) etc.? I know it isn’t me nor anyone I know. It must have gone somewhere? Colossal amounts. Mountains of cash. It just couldn’t just disappear.

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