Thursday, 8 September 2011

Electric Cars

Contributed by tedioustrantrums

Electric cars are only available in a GT version. No, not “Grand Tourer” unless a sixty mile trip there and back is a long journey for you. No the GT in this case stands for Gargoyle Treatment. Why have they made them so ugly? Normal cars look good mostly and hybrids aren’t too bad. But the Nissan Leaf, the G-Wiz (named after the remark passers-by use when they see one fold up completely in a crash), Ze car and Ze van (they look like the same vehicle to me) etc. etc. are not “easy on the eye”.
The government want us to buy electric cars to reduce carbon emissions (as if). The manufacturers might want to make them look less, well, less frightening if they are really that keen on selling them. The £5000 grant (bribe) towards the purchase price doesn’t really help. The cars are all massively overpriced compared to normal cars.
Now you’re going to say – “what about the Tessla, or the Mini, or the other electric cars which look just like their petrol/diesel variants?” That’s cheating. The Tesla is very expensive to start with and the other cars have limited ranges and they lose space and gain weight which compromises them.
There are few charging points. They take too long to charge. They are powered by electricity generated by coal, oil, gas and of course nuclear power stations which makes the carbon foot print or other environmental issues questionable at best. Their build also adds to their carbon foot print.
I’m thinking of getting a more environmentally friendly vehicle. I’ll change my current car in the spring. It’s hugely fast. It makes a wonderful noise when I press the hurry up pedal. My new to me vehicle will probably be a large 4x4 jeep with a V8 engine with a more open exhaust so it sounds amazing. I’ll get one which has been converted to LPG and pay 58p per litre. Fun to drive AND affordable.
That’ll do for me.
I admit to being a petrol head. I like cars and motorbikes. I also like cycling. I like those tree things and that natural green carpet people play sports on, grass they call it. I like a nice view without windmills. I don’t mind a walk through a wood or alongside a stream. I don’t mind wee furry or feathered things as long as they don’t bite, scratch or leak from their bottom in my vicinity.
Wasps however, I’m just not fond off. What is the point of a wasp? The wasp is the hoodie, chav or punk of nature. I don’t kill them unless they start to play that hovering game close to my nose, ear, head, hand etc, etc, which can end by them stinging because they can, Over and over again. For the hell of it. And why not?
Bottom line is I am in awe of mankind’s achievements. Nature has its place and we need to protect it appropriately but mankind? Our ingenuity knows no bounds, it just needs enough time and money and anything can be achieved.


Joe Public said...

I particularly like one of the Safety Devices recommended for electric cars.

A CD player + pre-recorded CD of a 'normal' car engine + external speakers, so normal folk can hear them coming.

Mind you, at the volume required for the 'leccy car to be heard, their range is reduced by 25%.

JRB said...

Bring back the horse and cart (or carriage for the more affluent).
Let us all return to more tranquil and sedate times.

Clarinda said...

Surely that lumpen shape cannot be aerodynamic on the road - I know I have enough difficulty walking in moderate windy conditions on the pavement!

Anonymous said...


Are you suggesting that you somehow resemble the aerodynamic shape of the cars in the photies

RMcGeddon said...

I've heard that the Nissan 'leaf' comes with a free calendar so that you can monitor your acceleration.
These cars seem to follow the usual pattern. Subsidise wealthy people with taxpayers money to buy the £35K car. Most people buying these cars use them as a second car as they're totally useless and no use for going on holiday. Or any long journey. The battery lasts 5 years and costs £7K to replace. That's right £7,000.
The cars are charged by power station electricity. Assuming you can find a charging point.
Wasps are more useful than these cars. Without wasps we'd be overun by wee beasties in the garden and house.

pa_broon74 said...

Generally, if you're happy to look like a character from the childrens TV program then electric cars are fine.

Like most people, I can't afford one, I have a 4x4 and motorbike. The former for chores and the latter for around town and fun.

I sound so middle class don't I...

RMcGeddon said...

I don't think those electric cars are ever fine pa. Remember that scientist who was killed recently when her electric car 'imploded' in a low speed crash....

The Transport agency were horrified when they crash tested these death traps at 40mph and everyone would have died.
They're allowed due to political expediency. Bread and circuses to make us feel good about the global warming scam thy're pushing. Similar to the folk on Tiree with their 'community turbine' providing them with a £100K a year bonus ( paid by all of us through elec bills). With a population of about 770 Tiree householders will pay more than £100K a year on their energy bills due to green surcharges and if the whole scam was stopped they would actually be better off. But people are daft I suppose and are easily brainwashed.

subrosa said...

I think the design in your picture is quite quirky petem, although it does look more like a posh golf cart rather than something I'd be prepared to use on the open road.

Tedious Tantrums said...

Joe, I hear they are especially good in winter. You have to switch the heater off and slowly freeze as the world goes by slowly whilst you travel at the same speed as the blizzard you are in.

Fun. No.

Tedious Tantrums said...

The thing about horse and carts is the horses incontinence.

Years ago when the local co-op still used horse drawn carts (the 60s) my friends mother was out in the street shovelling up the horses dovers for the roses when a Fire Engine went past. Her husband was driving it. It was a long time before he was allowed to forget that!

Tedious Tantrums said...

Hi Clarinda,

I doubt aerodynamics would be of much help to it. Unless it fell of a cliff. It would perhaps gain more speed if anyone was in it too. Nobody would be in it. Way too embarrassing.

Tedious Tantrums said...

Lupus. That's rude. Personally I think they were styled on those sweet peanuts that Woolies used to sell. Very, very similar.

Tedious Tantrums said...

Hi RM,

They are selling them in such tiny numbers I doubt we'll see much of them around. I've not tripped over a single plug lead here in Edinburgh.

I did read somewhere that someone (okay very, very tenuous link) had seen a cord coming out of a second floor flat and plugged into an electric car to charge it.

I also saw a car that looked like a wasp today. It was a yellow Alfa Romeo bug eyed thing with black stripes up the bonnet.

I don't mind if wasps get stuck into other bugs. Just no getting stuck into humans, again and again and again... eh?

My Scottish Granny used to say at this time of year to watch out for wasps because they knew they were going to die soon and they were pretty grumpy!

Tedious Tantrums said...

Hey Pa. Hen would never fit in a car like that. Horace would be able to tell you all about how it works. The Bairn and the twins might like it though. Maggie wouldn't be borrowing it to go out on a date with.

I may have to lie down in a dark room now...

Tedious Tantrums said...

RM. For me this is the worst thing about these silly cars. People will get badly squished if a cyclist leans on the car roof at the traffic lights.

It's a perfect example of greenie logic. Solve one problem with a solution which causes another one which is worse.

Tedious Tantrums said...

Well Subrosa these sorts of cars come in either bulbous or square. Colour wise it's always going to be bright colours so people can see you coming and they can park up before the laughing brought on by the electric car makes them crash their car.

If you live in the country you'd have to buy about six of these cars and park them along your route so when the battery dies miles from nowhere there's a space to jump into for the next stage. Repeat until you've been to coffee with the ladies and then home again.

Peter Melia said...

LPG is about 66% efficient compared with Petrol, so double your price of fuel.
If you really want to be ahead of the green curve, so far ahead that the opposition cannot even see you, go for good old Doctor Diesel's brainchild, the diesel engine, still the most efficient power converter ever ever conceived.
The Greenies will still hate you, for it is fossil fuel.

Peter Melia said...

Wasps are cool, don’t they eat spiders?
They are stupid as well, they catch themselves easily enough with a paper covered jam-jar containing jammy or honey water. They cannot get out through the little hole in the paper. so they drown.
They like water, are forever falling into the pool. The kids have learned to put a leaf underneath and rescue them. They (the mossies) then lay on the leaf for a while, look around, mutter the wasp equivalent of “bugger me!” and fly away. They don’t sting us. possible the Androcles Syndrome at work.
Now mosquitos ..... I’ve left hotel rooms in tropical climes with blood-spattered walls, my blood! Courtesy of mosquitos.
Never figured out “Why Mosquitos?”
Did Noah have two?

Tedious Tantrums said...

Joe, I hear they are especially good in winter. You have to switch the heater off and slowly freeze as the world goes by slowly whilst you travel at the same speed as the blizzard you are in.

Fun. No.

Tedious Tantrums said...

Peter. I'd get to own a V8 again tho. Fabulous noise.

I like things that save me money. The greenies aren't my fans anyway. Glad they aren't actually.

Genuine environmentalists are usually pretty good. They can see both sides of the argument.

Mosquitoes. DDT.

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