Thursday, 18 August 2011

The Usual Suspects Have Applied

Chief Constable Stephen House
Sir Hugh Orde (left)

Bernard Hogan-Howe

Tim Godwin


Boris Johnson, Theresa May and the MPA chairman Kit Malthouse will choose Britain's next top police officer.  The four candidates who applied are:

Top to bottom:

Stephen House, chief constable of Strathclyde Police

Sir Hugh Orde, president of ACPO (he's the one on the left)

Bernard Hogan-Howe, deputy Metropolitan Police commissioner

Tim Godwin, acting Metropolitan Police commissioner

All are highly ambitious, fully trained in diversity and equality and are experts in box-ticking and juggling statistics. It goes without saying they're also very well versed in police perks and pensions.

Which suspect would I elect? None of them. I would have liked to see the American given a chance but that's not to be as Mrs May has stamped her designer-shod foot.  He may have managed to change the culture for the good of the people, but now we'll have more of the same.

I've put a wee poll up on the right hand side if you'd like to take part in the selection process.

22 comments:

GHmltn said...

Cynic! ;)

Oldrightie said...

"None of them". As with Merkel and her fellow midget, Sarkozy, useless more of the same.

JRB said...

I see Ladbrokes are only offering ‘evens’ on the Weegie – a wee flutter should be ‘as safe as Houses’ :)

Sue said...

I think most of us agree "we wouldn't vote for any of them"... the corruption runs deep in the Police Force. What we need is fresh blood. The American would be keen to prove himself, he'd be a good choice.

subrosa said...

Too right I am GHmitn. :)

subrosa said...

That's the problem OR, more of the same.

subrosa said...

John, I never thought to check if there was betting for this.

Very witty - well done. :)

subrosa said...

Call me Dave has made a big error not bringing Teresa May into his office and telling her he's the boss Sue.

Crinkly & Ragged Arsed Philosophers said...

I hope the Home Secretary has more discernment in her people picking powers than she has for clothes designers.

Sow's ear and heavily raided purse springs to mind.

Demetrius said...

Either Bob Louis or David Briggs or both job sharing would be better on the whole. At least we could rely on them.

Brian said...

Why not Lord Sugar? The job is a strategic managerial/leadership one not a murder solving/traffic directing one so why is police experience so necessary? With a £3 billion annual budget and 32,000 coppers plus support staff there must be scope for savings via tight budgeting and vfm a la Amstrad and Viglen. It would be nice just to see if he was made to change his catchphrase to "You are retired on an enhanced pension, goodbye."

pa_broon74 said...

I think you've made a mistake SR, you've posted pictures (in order) of; Mr Potatohead, Charles Dance and Morticia, that guy from the coffee adverts/Buffy the Vampire slayer - I think his name is Richard Head and John Sargeant.

If I absolutely had to choose (default being, none of the above) it would be Richard Head, look at those eyes, so piercing! He'd have all the crooks on the run with that intense gaze, the criminals who aren't in the MET would be intimidated too.

I need to minimise the window your blog is in, he's giving me the creeps now...

Stop staring! It wasn't MEEEEEEE...

Brian said...

@pa_broon74: Please, not another Dick Head in charge of the Met. :-(

banned said...

Sir Hugh Orde is not flavour of the month in the Cameron Camp (ooh erh, missus) following the pass the blame debacle, that at least is a bonus.
I joined the Stalinist camp in your democratic exercise.

Anonymous said...

I vote for 'The Golfer', the police officer who blew the whistle on fake evidence in the Lockerbie trial.

- Aangirfan

Joe Public said...

Pity Jeremy Clarkson didn't apply.

Crime rates may not fall, but the Pandas would be interesting.

subrosa said...

Crinkly, I rather admire her choice of footwear. If I could afford it I would wear something similar but, then again, who wants to be in the majority. :)

subrosa said...

I had to google these names but yes Demetrius, I agree with you.

subrosa said...

Oh Brian, have you had a few too many nips? Lord Sugar? But I see what you mean though.

I feel a little empathy with the lower orders in the police, but then you know I think the police could learn from our military (although not faultless in any way) setup.

Piercing eyes have always made me feel a little uncomfortable although I'm very sure if I'd had to look into Steve McQueen's eyes (which are recorded as piercing) I just may have been pleasantly surprised.

subrosa said...

Are we Stalinist banned? Naw, but I agree with you.

I don't like the google poll system but I notice a few have voted for House from Strathclyde. He's perhaps worst of all because he's very into the politics. Won't bore you with the details. :)

subrosa said...

Jings Aangirfan, in future I'll ask you advice as to poll selections before I do one. I'd vote for him/her too.

subrosa said...

Ah Joe, we don't know do we just how good a job he would do with an experienced team behind him.

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