"I'll have a stiff one" has always meant a dram or small quantity of alcoholic spirit to me.
Now the EU has produced a new meaning. MEPs can claim for Viagra on their health insurance and the taxpayer pays the bill. All Brussels officials and politicians can get the sex aid drug for free if needed. They can even claim for heroin replacement methadone under the EU scheme.
Other free options include penis implants the UK Independence Party discovered.
Official guidelines for claims reads: 'Treatments with Viagra will from now on be reimbursable.' The document also says the cost of drugs used during withdrawal treatment for addicts should be reimbursed in full. It adds: 'These products qualify for a special reimbursement at the rate of 100% for a maximum of six months.'
Last year it was revealed MEPs receive public funding for massages and feng shui. Other perks which qualify include mud baths, hydromassage and mild electric shock treatment.
I'd be happy to fund electric shock treatment but only at a voltage I define. Don't be surprised if Westminster says they too must accept these guidelines. We're reputedly the quickest country to adopt EU regulation and I can't see MPs missing out on this one. Does Viagra stiffen backbones?