Wednesday 11 August 2010

"I'll have a stiff one thanks"



"I'll have a stiff one" has always meant a dram or small quantity of alcoholic spirit to me.

Now the EU has produced a new meaning. MEPs can claim for Viagra on their health insurance and the taxpayer pays the bill. All Brussels officials and politicians can get the sex aid drug for free if needed. They can even claim for heroin replacement methadone under the EU scheme.

Other free options include penis implants the UK Independence Party discovered.

Official guidelines for claims reads: 'Treatments with Viagra will from now on be reimbursable.' The document also says the cost of drugs used during withdrawal treatment for addicts should be reimbursed in full. It adds: 'These products qualify for a special reimbursement at the rate of 100% for a maximum of six months.'

Last year it was revealed MEPs receive public funding for massages and feng shui. Other perks which qualify include mud baths, hydromassage and mild electric shock treatment.

I'd be happy to fund electric shock treatment but only at a voltage I define. Don't be surprised if Westminster says they too must accept these guidelines. We're reputedly the quickest country to adopt EU regulation and I can't see MPs missing out on this one. Does Viagra stiffen backbones?



21 comments:

INCOMING!!!!!!! said...

SR If ever we needed proof that they are all impotent epicurean jaffas we have it now.

Captain Ranty said...

Rosie,

You presume too much.

If more of them possessed backbones we wouldn't be in this mess today.

CR.

wv = comists. I kid you not.

Dick Puddlecote said...

You'll be packing your sussies and popping to Brussels for the weekend then, Rosie? ;)

subrosa said...

We do indeed Incoming.

subrosa said...

Very true CR. Love the WV. :)

Demetrius said...

Is this the kind of inflation the Governor of the Bank of England was worried about? I think we should be told.

subrosa said...

Dick I can tell you I'll not be nipping to Brussels. Being in the company of Viagra swallowing opportunists who may well be on a methadone programme isn't my idea of a good time.

I've still a bit of life in me yet. ;)

Apogee said...

Hi SR, Have a feeling this is them telling us what they intend to do to us !

subrosa said...

Ah Apogee! That's exactly what I thought when I typed this. :)

subrosa said...

I don't think so Demetrius. The Bank of England's inflation is expected to last more than 20 minutes. Surely.

Joe Public said...

Even impotent Politicians can now screw the taxpayers.

JuliaM said...

"Other free options include penis implants the UK Independence Party discovered."

Surely they wouldn't need this, being massive dicks already..?

cynicalHighlander said...

The World is mad and we are mad in dilligently standing in line to cast our vote for these pr*cks.

Key bored warrior. said...

cynicalHighlander said...

"The World is mad and we are mad in dilligently standing in line to cast our vote for these pr*cks"

------------------------------------
There are all sorts of connotations springing from your post. Why should we be paying for these shites to fornicate and procreate? Why on earth will someone not stand up, and speak for the poor down trodden flacid members of the tax paying plebs who are sooked dry at every turn. I am convinced that the best way forward for Scotland is to withdraw it's members from both unions.

Do you wear sussies Rosie? ;o))

subrosa said...

Politically impotent you mean of course Joe.

subrosa said...

We are mad CH yet I know there's anger. Are people so insular these days that they're concentrating on protecting the little they do have? I think so.

subrosa said...

KBW, I've worn sussies long before the hold ups ever were invented. I've still a drawer full of them and beautiful silk stockings. Seldom brought into service these days but still, now and again when they are they remind me of many many interesting days. ;)

Dark Lochnagar said...

When are people going to open their eyes and string a few of these bastards up?

Key bored warrior. said...

Rosie a real women, I knew ther was a side to you.

subrosa said...

Auch KBW, they were my defence against the testosterone of many working invironments. ;)

subrosa said...

When taxes go so high people begin to notice DL. They're content at present to keep paying them without protest.

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